Kidney Infection — A One Star Review

I cannot recommend a kidney infection. 

And do not understand a certain affection 

     For ailments with titles familiar and plain. 

Wouldn’t you rather an “impingement syndrome” 

than plain “tendinitis” (which sounds quite humdrum)

     or “contusion” than “bruise” (which is simply mundane).

But this hackneyed disorder (back to my point)

Brings an ache and a torment into every joint

     And a feverish, shivery, drenched perspiration. 

Kidney infection: a carnival ride,

You’re ice when you’re up and muck-sweat the downside

     (Besides having a title that lacks inspiration).

This vile infection (of mean nomenclature)

Puts me quite out of sorts, against my better nature.

     It’s a pain in the back and is simply no fun.

So for want of enjoyment, cheer, bliss, or glee

(And a moniker lacking in all novelty)

     Out of five stars, this infection gets ONE!